moolahs!

i have 5 bucks in my wallet. and i'm going out for the whole of tmr (plus nice dinner with the canoeing people.) and saturday, i have to book a hotel. and sunday, lunch with michelle. i am so broke it's painful!
i need a job. emailed health promotion board, but they havent replied yet! and learning lab. but well, i was so damn casual in my letter to learning lab, i doubt they think i was serious.
i need a job!!!
but nobody's giving me one.
so i have hereby decided that next week, i shall stay at home, and not step a foot outside. so i wont spend much money. heh.
oh! and there's a new machine at the civic centre! it's a dvd renting machine! bliss. and it's really cool, u scan your thumbprint and ic to set up an account. and then u add money in it, and when u rent dvds, it just gets deducted from there! and it's only 3.95 per dvd on wednesdays. so i borrowed beauty shop today.
and my room is in a huge mess. it's looks neat, and tranquill at a glance. but when u open the drawers and stuff, it's a huge mess. and my notes. are just all over the place, irritating me. have to pack them for my younger cousin who's in j1, and hoho. i wanna just gloat. he can just spend the next year looking at organic chem and what nots and i will gallivinate around, (hopefully with a job by then). so i packed my chem notes for him, and i was thinking, i can make a killing by selling all my notes. but of course, i am nice, and i shall pass all those things to him. although i say he'll have to sort out the notes by himself. i couldnt be bothered.

okay. handbell tmr. hopefully i wont be as exhausted.

handbells

okay, i went for my first handbell prac in like 2 years. and i am TIRED. and i left halfway. cuz i didnt know it was practice from nine to five and i made other plans.
i was DYING. everybody else who doesnt know a thing about handbells (which is like, the whole world, really.) are going like, what u get exhausted from holding a few bells?. It's the standing and focussing for like 4-5 hours straight. and that's only half a practice.
at least for canoeing i get to sit in a boat.
and then i'll wonder how i managed to do all that in secondary school. syf practices every morning. ancalima. performances. i had powerful calves.
but not now. and i'm really lousy at all the musical stuff now, i gotta go highlight all my notes tmr. corinne's going to be appalled this saturday. but thank goodness i think i'm still better than the sec1s.
i like jingle bells! it's nice to play.
but i think i'm gonna humiliate myself at novena square, or wherever we're peforming. I'M THE MELODY LINE FOR HALF OF THE PERFORMANCES. i just screwed myself, by offering to take that part. cuz i thought i was still skilled and able at these kinda things. (i look back at my syf year with pride and fondness). but now, terrible, terrible.
i hope corinne doesnt scold me.

okay. i am tired from today. i shall go, and wallow in misery of humiliating myself come 10, 14 december.

victor krum!

victor krum is hot! i want!
hoho.
harry potter was nice. cho chang's not pretty though. why pick her!
typing my cv now, for learning lab. urgh. i'm painstakingly typing all my cca and grades. so hopefully they dont offer me with a shitty job, or not pick me at all.
and i love corsets! but i dont have one. i want a nice, nice corset. but they'll usually expensive. and actually, quite uncomfortable.
i need money, my pockets are empty.
and today, stupid woman at the bank spelt university of pennsylvania as university of penn sylvania on the bank draft. apparantly when i wrote the name down, my n and my s were quite far apart. but why will pennsylvania suddenly have a gap in between! and they had to redo it, deducting twice the amount and they'll refund. but because the buying and selling rate of the usd is different, i'll actually lose money. and i have to pay twice the commision. wtf! these people have no common sense. i dont have so much money for you to make dumb mistakes like that!
mom wants to go down to the bank to scold them tmr.

i ordered a bag from supre!
but now my pockets are empty.
tragic.

BORED

BORED.

AND PISSED OFF.

wanna adopt bobby the beagle.

wanna apply to many colleges, but filling out applications is such a chore.

wanna make limwire work again.

wanna take a frying pan and hit you on the head with it.

me and synyi. half of jaya's face cut out, and carolyn's hair.
synyi-picture ready. the only decent picture i have of the outing. left my cam in the bag at the club, and i deposited my bag in the locker, so no pics at the club. this is at carolyn's house.

chinablack.

celebrated the end of exams with a bang. we went to little india for lunch. and did our eyebrows. and it just so happened that there was a bride-to-be there doing a photoshoot. a chinese in traditional indian clothes. quite cool, the gown was intricate, and there were so many ornaments on her head.
and i bought bangles from lil india. it's like bangle-paradise there! carolyn bought her prom outfit. a slinky back baring top. there's this shop along lil india that sells very skimpy tops. but it was cool.
after that janani fell sick. very unfortunate. so we all moved our stuff to carol's house, conveniently located behind fareast plaza.
and we shopped and shopped and shopped.
bought a bolero from zara.
yayness.

and later at night, it was chinablack. dabbed on makeup, and then carolyn's dad fetched us there.
thank goodness charlene and kitfei were there and were nice enough to, help us, er adapt. cuz we werent too sure what to do, being virgin clubbers.
and it was good that all the jc people were there. saw like my pri school classmate, ex-rg people, the hc canoeing team. the twins were really drunk. charlene helped us order 2 jugs of vodka with 7-up, but quite honestly there i tasted more 7-up than vodka.
but later carolyn felt a little dizzy, so we took a walk outside and gave the drinks away. and so we left the club early.
clubbing's quite fun, but quite pointless. and it's expensive. i'd much rather spend my money on clothes.

then we headed back to carolyn's house.
and the next morning, it was macs breakfast and prime! uma thurman's gorgeous, and i liked the show.

urgh. my left jaw is very painful. think i shall go visit the doctor soon.

annoyed. baffled. jaded.

tmr, tmr tmr. tmr i'll be done.
this exam has dragged on so long, i'm quite past the point of caring. i'm just gonna go do physics, as well as i can do it, and then if pass, good for me, if not, then... there's nothing much i can do anyway.
and if i get a scholarship then that'll be great. but if i dont, i guess it's not too bad staying here either. friends and nice people are still gonna be here anyway.

garh. pretty annoyed right now.
i wanna like start work immediately. so i can keep myself busy and not be bothered by shit.
i want to keep a pet too. at least i know i'll get all the love i need when, i do need some.
oh well.

shall look forward to the day tmr. shopping!

tmr, tmr tmr. tmr i'll be done.
this exam has dragged on so long, i'm quite past the point of caring. i'm just gonna go do physics, as well as i can do it, and then if pass, good for me, if not, then... there's nothing much i can do anyway.
and if i get a scholarship then that'll be great. but if i dont, i guess it's not too bad staying here either. friends and nice people are still gonna be here anyway.

garh. pretty annoyed right now.
i wanna like start work immediately. so i can keep myself busy and not be bothered by shit.
i want to keep a pet too. at least i know i'll get all the love i need when, i do need some.
oh well.

shall look forward to the day tmr. shopping!

carolling!

i'm going handbell carolling! haha, i've never been before, because i'm always too busy during the holidays. but i think i'm quite lousy at those bells now. the last time i did anything remotely musical was more than 2 years ago. ah, we'll see.
and i've shortlisted the places where i'm gonna work at. so it's either health promotion board, hdb, some norwegian shipping company, or sla or aia. shall call them next week!
oh and i bought my prom dress. it's floral. i'm suprised by my choice, because i'm not a floral person.
i think i should go do some physics s. because i just screwed myself during math s. ohwell, come march, we'll see.
cant wait for friday!

MATH S STINKS

MATHS S STINKSSSSSS!
ah! i think i'm pretty much assured of a U for math s already. very embarrasing. but highly probable. because i didnt do the easy questions..cuz i thought they were hard. and then i couldn do much. except 2 questions. which would add up to like 15 marks? and assuming cambridge examiners are nice people. and give me 10 marks for the rest of the crap i wrote, i'll get 25. which isnt gonna get me anywhere.
pffpth.
terrible.
i can just stay in singapore and be a lousy accountant.
tragic.

elf!

yay i ordered elf stuff! hopefully it wont go oos on me. And i discovered my exclassmate is a spree organiser, which makes things easier, cuz i'll obviously trust her more than a stranger.
fm paper one on friday. i thought i did okay at first, until everybody started talking after the exam. I guess i was too used to the trauma during an fm paper anything slightly less, i become euphoric. Got the matrices question wrong cuz i copied the numbers wrongly. not a very smart thing to do, but oh well.
i'm just quite relieved it's fm is half over.

went to paragon today. bought a bra and a tank! yayness.
i'm gonna do alot of things after my exams. like shop! i havent been out in a such a long time, today's trip to town felt abit weird.
i'm going to learn how to cook after exams. learn how to put on makeup nicely. i'm gonna watch all the movies i want to watch. i'm gonna go on day-long shopping trips.
except i think i'll be broke, but i'll solve all that by getting a temp job! for the next 6-7 mths or so. i was thinking of being a salesgirl or smt to get staff discounts. haha! but i think an admin job will be better, cuz dont think i want to stand on my feet all the day and be at the beckon and call of pushy and irate customers.
and i might give tuition at the same time, to earn extra cash for the US trip. urban outfitters, a&f, sephora's, ae. okay, i'm ridiculously high now thinking about all these.
and possibly a second trip to a nearby destination like, bali! or hongkong! i want to go sri lanka. because the beaches are nice and the warehouses there are phenomenal.

yay!

physics and math down. although i still have math& physics s, but i cant do much about that.
today's physics paper3 was alright. although i redid question 2 so many times because i make stupid mistakes like writing 0.0143 as 0.0314 or smt like that. I was so untidy it's, appalling.
so i hope paper 3 will do some good for my extremely screwed up p2.
got fm left. which i'm quite terrified of. If i get an A for that, it'll be quite surreal.
i need to do alot of things after my exams! i need to look for a dress. oh mom bought me shoes for prom. it's alright, but it's quite silly to buy shoes first, cuz now i need to find a dress that'll match with the shoes.
and there's this whole big, hoohaover dawn yeo/yang. she's real hot, except everything's plastic. i say, her plastic surgeon is really good.

oh and i got a lovely new samsung phone! i like it. except i dont know how to enable bluetooth. dont know my pin number. but nvm, shall call them when i'm free!

karma

i say, it's not a very smart thing to do--trying to threaten me when you obviously have more skeletons in the closet then i do.
and that's just despicable and low, even more so when it's over something so trivial.
pffpht. so that left me pretty upset in the day. coupled with the fact that i was very fedup the last few days. with all the bad karma at home. and i'm in the middle of my exams. so i think i kinda lost it, halfway.

so cmath is over and done with. tmr's gp. maybe i'll produce a good essay. what, with all the angst and anger. i always think u write better when u're emotionally charged. haha.
and when i came home, i totally crashed out. i slept, for a while. but apparantly the alarm was blaring into my ears, and i slept on. which is weird. because usually i dont need an alarm. my brain's pretty good at waking itself up. i think i was too tired from the week's events.

i want 25th nov now. so i can get out of the house. and not face people i dislike at home. oh yes, my family going's to genting this coming new year's eve, i think. i'm not particularly excited. because i'm going with my family. i dont hate them or anything. but it's not very exciting going to theme parks with your family, because none of them will take the rides. or do anything remotely fun. please let the trip be somewhat decent.
urgh.

me and yonghui. ah, my bad skin.
us!!
glenda, the birthday girl. and zach.

glenda's birthday!

today was glenda's birthday. so we all went to surprise her at botanic gardens. me and yonghui walked all the way into the botanic gardens from the bus stop! and to our horror, it was too damn far in. and cabs were zooming past us, all occupied by wise people who decided cabbing was better. we walked like some ten thousand metres before reaching.
oh, and glenda's classmates were there too. so we were hiding behind trees, waiting for glenda and zach to appear, and when they did, we yelled suprise! okay, actually only yonghui and vidia did. haha.
and we ordered pizza, chicken wings and calamari, and i bought chips, yash made muffins. so yes, ruffles chips are "baked" by me, just to prove that i wasnt useless.
oh yes, vidia is mad.i think that's how u spell her name. she started singing very loudly with a weird plant thingy as a microphone, but it was funny. haha.
then me glenda yonghui and yash went for dessert at wisma. oh the food courts upstairs is pretty cool! and very big.
so it was a good day today.
except my stupid camera. someting has happened to it. i cant upload pictures. and it's extremely annoying. technology just loves screwing up on me. i wanna upload pics! now!!!!!!

ah today was nice, although i did not study as much as i did. did cmath paper1, and 2 questions of fmath. because fmath is draining and tiring.

and i played, some football, okay fine. just like kicking the ball round kinda football, if u would even call it that. hahah. it's quite fun!

am very tired.
my hamstring hurts!

ah, mom's back from taiwan! so i was listening to her stories half the afternoon. rather amused. she bought me a mickey mouse tote bag, which i thought was really cute.
and a few ridiculously bright shorts for me, "to wear at home". i'll never wear those things out. and she brought home boxes of food! yay. the lychee jelly thingy is really nice, and there are those pineapple things, and oh, mua chi!

and i wanted to get my international money order for berkeley today at the post office. and the line was so long, it was madness. i would have to wait an hour for my transaction, so i decided i shall go on friday, during the opening time so i wont have to jostle with foreign workers remitting money home.
and i keep getting very paranoid that my application will get lost en route to us. ah! maybe i shld have just done it online. which i discovered today. a little late but nvm.

i havent exercised in, 20219834 years. and my right hamstring is hurting. see, i have this back problem, that affects my right leg. and exercising helps, like swimming and some jogging. but i'm too lazy, so now it hurts. :(

and i think me and my sister were talking about overseas univerisites over crystal jade egg tarts. those tarts are perfect, i wish i could have a supply of it at home. but anyway, i really really want to study overseas. and for reasons more than just to get out of Singapore and to relish the study-abroad experience. much more than that.
now, if only i'm loaded. then my parents can send me to us/uk. and now, the more i think of it, the more i wanna study in us. but those darned applications are just too expensive. and it's not easy to get in, i mean the better colleges. i doubt berkeley and penn are going to accept me, but i'm still hopeful.

and coupled with that, i need to do extremely well for As. Like, i have to actually pass my S papers, on top of 4As. and well, A for gp as well.

and then when i think of all these, studying overseas suddenly just seems like a dream, and will remain so.

bleagh.
did i mention? my forehead is like pimples galore!
gahh.